I spent Tuesday and Wednesday this week with Rob Bell and 50 other passionate, loving, creative, honest people. I have to mention it, not to name drop, but to honor the way it shaped me, and be public with my gratitude for that time and space, and those persons. I am fueled and humbled, stilled and motivated. And, definitely re-centered in (as Rob says) "the divine impulse to make something of the world."
In the last few years I lost that impulse in a flood of rational thinking. The rational thinking was, at its core, a defense mechanism against the pain of faith and hope. Pain of faith and hope? Two such happy sounding things actually take a lot of work for me. More will be coming on that in the future.
But this week, I opened myself up to have faith in unknown, unanswerable things, and hope in divine impulses and appointments. At about 9:30 in the still warm morning, I gathered my courage to raise my hand and share the story of the things I've learned about life while witnessing death and illness. To my great joy, the people with me affirmed my voice and message. They overwhelmed me with their response.
Because of this time, I will have the privilege of traveling to several states to share my story. I experienced the privilege of a personal hero (Rob Bell) validating and helping hone my message. I felt something mysterious welling in me. And I went surfing. It's hard to say how closely to link the welling and the surfing... (just know I grinned from ear to ear the whole time).